"We are blogging, one and all"

Katie, the last time one of us blogged was September 9th.
yeah, that's because i failed to blog back to you.
So many things have happened since then. We should tell our readers all about what has been happening in our separate lives, even though we have not really separated our lives.
we have failed to separate our lives.
Katie, what will happen when you really move?
i don't know, it seems like i moved, but i didn't. i just have no home.
Can i write "I just have no home"?
yeah, that'll be sad.

everyone already knows all the news we have to tell, but we are still going to blog about it.
Katie, has anything life altering happened to you since Sept. 9th?
well, there was sept. 10th.
Ah, anything magical happen on that day?
yes. magical.
Great.
maybe if people don't know, we should make them guess what it was.
That never goes over very well. all of our mysteries are not really mysteries. Everyone who reads this already knows everything about us.
should we make it multiple choice, then?
All right, let's try that:
Which of these happened to Katie on September 10th, 2008?
a. I learned about being a honey farmer
b.(We should have made a, b) I visited the birthplace of America (what? Well, Alexandria claims to be the birthplace of America because some farmer back in the day found a stone that had viking writing on it from 1412 or something like that, 1312, ancient 92, whatever).
c.I got engaged
d. My boyfriend got engaged (yes, but that didn't happen to you. but it affect me.)
e.And the next day I went bass fishing (The question was "Which of these happened to Katie on September 10th, 2008?" Now our plan of having the right answer be "all of the above" is foiled. i was just giving you a time line of all that happened while we were apart. We were apart. : ( and soon we will be apart, again. and i also learned that when you are cutting the fish open, you smack it on the head with the end of the knife, so it stops wiggling.)
f. all of the above

What did you do while we were apart? Do you want to tell about that?
I suppose I should. Not so much happened because you returned shortly after you left, and I blogged to you part of the time you were away.
Rub that in my face, how i am an infurior blogger.
I cannot spell inferiour
i-n-f-e-r-i-o-r
Rub that in my face, why don't ya.

Any parting words?
we are done already?
Well, the last thing you said was "um" and then you stared off into space for a while.
i was expecting you to banter about something that would cause me to banter.
No, instead I shall include a picture of our empty apartment that is no longer our home:

katie, the royals lost, and you are in minnesota where they are, but i am not, and that means we are apart. forevermore.

Well, Katie, I don't know how to tell you, but we've broken up. The day came, and neither one of us knew. I'm pretty sure you missed it completely since you've gone off to Minnesota with all of your belongings. But you are there, far away, just as we knew it would happen, and I am here, in my very own basement room at the place that used to be known as Juliet and Jeremy's but will now be known as Juliet and Jeremy's. Oh, yeah, and Amanda's.
It is a bit shocking--I did not intend to move the same day you left, but Juliet said, "Let's move you." And I said, "ok." (I'm very hard to convince, you see.)
Since my bed is now here, in my very own basement room, and no longer in our joint bedroom at Haverford West (yours is still there, alone, and very lonely, I might add. As well as being lonesome), we didn't even realize it was our last night in our apartment. I feel cheated. I feel denied. I feel jipped. And it must be remedied. I think we need to have a party. For a party is the only place where spirits can be revived, wrongs can be rightened, and drink treats can be enjoyed to their fullest. A date for this revelry, you ask? That could be a problem, considering, you are gone, and plan to be gone for quite some time. But I do have some musts for this gathering, and they are as such:

1. It must be in our apartment. (So, before the 1st of October).
2. It must include many people with whom we've shared this past year of our lives with and who have supported the Compounded, even in its irresponsible and repeated absences.
3. We will both sleep at the apartment for one final time.
4. Drink treats.
5. Spatulas. (You know what I mean, and if any of you don't, well, you'll soon know.)
6. I'm out of things to list, but I'm not quite done listing.
7. My mattress smells like smoke from our apartment, and it's never coming out. I blame all smokers everywhere. I do not hate you, but I do blame you, and for that, you should all feel very, very responsible--directly responsible--solely responsible.
8. Who makes a list of eight things? No one. That would be ridiculous
9. Now, nine, that's getting somewhere. That's like saying, I don't need ten items. I'm content. I'm satisfied. I need nothing more.
10. Yet, ten is so complete. It ends many things, like counting to ten, and a train with ten cars, and ten lists of ten things.
11. Eleven? Idiots.

During the royals game. . .

Katie, we should blog.
amanda, no one has read our last blog.
Yes, they have.
i don't feel like blogging unless people comment.
They do not trust us with their hearts because we have failed them. The more we blog, the more they will comment.
false.
No, you will see. It will be true. If not, then we will strike out the best way we know how--though, I don't know what that is.
swinging.
What?
you said how will we strike out. I answered swinging. How can you not understand that?
Not strike out as in baseball, though I can see how you would be confused by that, but as in forcing those who read our blog to comment by threatening dangerous repercussions if they don't.
yeah but where do you think the term strike out comes from? It still pertains.
I don't see how. . . all right, I'll accept it for the sake of preventing a fight since we have so little time left together. Readers, if you do not comment, we shall strike out at you swinging. And we mean that.
oh ok now i see what you mean by strike out. you mean a violent physical attack. ok, yeah. i know how you are. don't worry readers. I will not strike out at you
But you are the one who wanted them to comment. You didn't want to blog if they aren't going to leave feedback. How in the freaking world are we supposed to get them to comment if we don't threaten their very lives?
I think I am spotting a theme/problem here. We need more focus on the positive side of things. It would make us feel great if people read and enjoyed our blog, but i refuse to have negative consequences if that doesn't happen.
I know how to solve this, we shall ask our second guest blogger to decide whether we should threaten our readers or not.
Hello readers of the compounded.
You are useless. You typed one sentence in five minutes. We denounce you has a guest blogger.
true. you pale in comparison to our mystery guest blogger of our trip to Minnesota.
I will not stand for this negativity. If positive roommate blogging entertainment cannot take on this blog then I shall have to start my own roommate blog. I denounce the compounded!
*Gasp*
Wow someone is a little extra sensitive. I was just trying to stick up for my roommate, but I guess I should know better.
This has gone too far.
I don't have time for this. I'm going to help my roommate win the woman of his dreams. You'll be able to read about their soon to be developing relationship on our superior roommate blog (www.beergarden.blogspot.com if it hasn't been taken yet).
Don't try to steal our readers!
Oh, fine, you can have them, well, have them part of the time. But be warned, they might not comment, and you will feel sad and lonely. Be careful in the world of blogging, you may find yourself swinging threats at your readers and insulting guest bloggers and not know how you have come to travel such a dark and desperate path.


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Fog o' Dusk

This is our first live action blog (though it is not actually live, but we would like it to be), so you should all be very happy about it. It is also the reuniting of us from our solo blogs.

Iowa is false because gas is so cheap.

Why is that false, Katie?

I don't know.

There is so much reunitionism here that there is another person here with us (note: In line with the Credit where Credit is Due Honor Code, our mystery guest did in fact coin the term "Reunitionism").

That sounds like a religion. I'm a reunitionist.

Who could this person be?

A mystery.

Before we get into that, we must lay down some ground rules. First, we are on our way to Minnesota. That is why this is a kind of live action blog. The action is our trip and the live is that we are typing on the way.

Secondly, there will be a mystery for you to solve.

Third rule, there will be no comma splices.

I'm not even sure I know what a comma splice is.

Hush, mystery guest. We have to introduce you first.

Didn't you kind of introduce me when you announced a mystery guest?

Not officially. All right, are we done with the rules?

Um, well, I guess so.

We just entered Story County, and I thought it was Story Country.

We should interrupt with a story, since it is a live action blog.

Oh, and now this story from the life of our mystery guest.

Oh, what story should I tell?

About your foot injury.

Which one? All two of them? Shall I start chronologically or start with the most recent?

Least to most traumatic.

How many stories do you have?

Two.

Plus, a possible broken pinky toe.

I can't even tell if I broke it.

That can be part of the mystery. That's the nature of the foot, that you can't even tell if your toes are broken.

Katie, you talk so much more when we have a third person.

That is because I'm usually just home from work, and you just sit there and talk to yourself. And then pass the computer to me. We blog in silence.

Perhaps you should have guest bloggers more often.

We don't blog in silence.

I know, but sometimes in moments we do. You type and then I type and then we laugh at what each other said.

We are two miles from Ames.

So close. You should tell them about Taco Time.

We need some facts. Do you have facts?

It is apparently delicious. Perhaps we should go to Taco Time and gather facts, and a burrito.

Is it time for your second dinner?

You have second dinners?

I do when I stop at Taco Time.

You don't even know if Taco Time is good.

I do know it is good. It's been recommended.

He's trusting of his sources.

You just gave a clue of something about our mystery guest.

We shall pause. Good bye.

Taco Time Trash. That is what we have. We successfully found and visited Taco Time in Ames, Iowa, as was recommended to our mystery guest by a coworker. (note: The food was not trash at Taco Time, just the wrappings from our food were trash. Clarification. There we go.)

Tell them how delicious it is. We think there is one in Kuwait. I looked it up online, and we think there is one there.

That is crazy. I didn't know it was that popular.

It is so popular.

Are there only two Taco Times?

It seems like it would be a chain.

Nope, just Kuwait and Ames.

Thank you for taking us to Taco Time, Katie.

Did you want me to blog your thankfulness?

Yes.

Maybe on the way back we can go to The Flying Burrito. Which is similar to Chipotle.

How do you spell burrito?

B-u-r-r-i-t-o.

Don't you have spell check?

Yes, but I'm just asking.

It is so much more fun to pretend to have our own Spelling Bee.

Story City!

We need another story, or the first story.

We need the story of the damaged foot!

I don't know which one to tell.

Ready, pick one, go:

I don't know how to response to this situation.

This is what blogging is all about.

You have to be cool and quick under pressure.

“Under pressure. . . ”

So, I work at Quik Trip--

Another clue!

So, sometimes when I work at the warehouse north of the river, I break down pallets--

Pallets?

Wooden skids.

I'm sorry but I don't think clarifies anything.

It does if you know the lingo.

So, these pallets include rusty nails, and I'm breaking down a pallet, and a rusty nail stabs my foot. And it hurt and bled.

Did you scream?

Kind of like a little girl.

Katie's Corner (on the driver's side of the car):

Well, every time I change lanes, a ginormous green blinker comes on.

How do you spell ginormous?

Sorry, ginormous is an overstatement. It's about the ratio of large print to regular print.

We are 187 miles from Minneapolis.

Now I have to find the 8 and 7 on the computer.

They are right by each other.

It is dark!

Is it too hard?

Upcoming Events:

Saturday, July 26^th of 2008--

Katie and Steve will be attending a wedding.

Amanda and the mystery guest will be doing some exciting things around Minneapolis that are adventurous.

Any final words?

Final words sound so threatening.

It's not like your last meal.

I would like to speak again.

You may, you may.

results request

hello my dear roommate.

well, you may have thought this day would never come. But in fact it is now here. This is the day that I write my first solo blog. You may be shocked to find out that you are sitting right next to me as I blog this. But then again who knows. You might turn around and talk to me before I finish this in which case you will see what I am doing. Actually I can see what you are doing since I am sitting behind you and you are looking at information for your new online schooling. By the way when is that going to start? I wish you the best of luck. Sometimes class can be fun! (there might even be prizes, who knows). Okay probably no prizes, and I will not promise you any because we all know how I am about coming through with prizes I have offered. I don't quite understand what you like about taking a class without getting to see any people, but you love it so congratulations.
Now on a very important subject. There have been many rumors and accusations flying around about our future living situation. Well all of those rumors and accusations are true. soon we will no longer live together. I will not go into my feelings on this matter, for I don't want to dampen any good mood any reader might happen to be in while reading this. I will keep all discussion purely focused on the blog. I am trying to predict the change this may have on our blogging habits. I am afraid to say that it might make it worse. But then again the good news is that we could not possibly blog any less than we do now and still call ourselves bloggers. even though i am pretty sure i have never called you a blogger before, you never know when I may decide to start. But maybe, since I will never see you anymore, our entire friendship will be reduced to writing. I don't know how far mental picture texts can go. For now though I will choose to live in denial. I will blog only on the rarest of occasion, because I will always see you so often.
now that we have settled that I would like to talk about upcoming events. We are about to set out for a nice road trip. We will be leaving Friday after work and returning on Sunday. There will be so much fun and adventure I can't even begin to describe it all here. So I won't even bother trying. Just be ready to hold on to your hat. If you don't have a hat, you better get one.
There is just one last issue to address. What's the deal about promising ice cream if people don't like the blog? it just seems a little backwards to me. Ice cream seems more fun than that. that is all, good bye.
(by the way if you wonder about the title, it is what I most commonly use as a subject for work emails, and I just sort of typed it and then left it).

A letter:

Dear Katie,
Many will be confused as to why I am addressing you in a letter form and not directly with my characteristic green font. Well, I will tell them, for there is no need to tell you because you already know.
In a few short months, Katie and I will no longer be roommates. This is sad news. We are spilling tears from our eyes right now, and have nothing to wipe them away with because the flow is too strong to stop with anything but the most absorbent of tissue, and alas, we have none. Actually, I have no idea if rivers are pouring from Katie's eye sockets or if she is out of super bibulous (this is a word, and is probably being used incorrectly, but come on, bibulous!) Kleenex to dry those floods, because she is not here. Nor am I particularly driven to tears at this exact moment. I mean, if I were to stop to dwell on the misery that awaits me in parting with Katie as my roommate, the tears would indeed spill over onto my pajamas and soak me more than playing in the rain. And if Katie was here, and she also started thinking about how terribly sad it is going to be when we part roommate ways, then there would be a downpour from her tear ducts as well. So, in short, we could possibly be crying gusts out of our faces, yet we are not, because we are parted right now and are both thinking about other things. But there is a strong likely hood that if we were together, we'd be sobbing. I'd say a 1 in 7 chance. Or 2 in 16.

Katie and I have discussed what should become of this, our blog. Should we kill it? Granted, we have almost done just that in the past few months. Not because we have no heart for our readers and wish to deny their every hope and dream of having a blog everyday, but simply because we are lazy and Katie hates her job so much it robs her of the will to blog, and I have sympathy pains for her; therefore I cannot even remotely be expected to cheer her up enough for us to blog together, not even a measly two posts a week.
Even in light of this almost death of The Compounded, we decided no, we do not want to kill it. Not at all.
But, how, we asked, can a blog encircling the world of two roommates be expected to survive if the two are no longer roommates? It was this question that led us to our answer:
We shall . . . solo post.
Quiet down! Do not be outraged! Calm yourself! There is no need for hysterics! All shall be well! Life will not be flipped inside out and no longer make sense because of this. Order and chaos will battle for a time, but in the end, harmony will prevail. The Compounded will survive, and become more vibrant than it has ever been before. Take a moment, put aside your doubt and desire to curl up and die, and look at the possibilities:

1. Did we not once say that if one of us died, there would be more posts? Well, if it helps, think of this as though one of us is dead. I believe that association will put your mind at ease.

2. Also, if perhaps, there is a day that Katie feels horrible about her job, or I am feeling particularly pained for her, then there will then be the possibility of at least one person being able to pluck up enough motivation to blog without having to cheer the other half to do so.

3.You will love it.

4.Anyone who has major complaints may have some ice cream on us. (Not on us. Not really. I feel the need to clarify considering some of our most loyal readers tend to take things a tad too literally--Jeremy. We will purchase ice cream for you to eat to heal your woes, but it will be in a bowl, not on us. That is messy.)

5.Finally, Katie, I have a proposition: Though we will no longer be actual roommates, perhaps we can still refer to one another as such in this blog. I feel that connection will aid in everyone's healing in this time of change and out pouring of tears.

I think this ends my first (technically, second) solo post. I do feel a bit lonely without Katie at my side, even asleep near my side, in the other room, as sometimes it happens. I look over at her bed, and it is empty. Is this how it will feel in just three months? So lonesome without her? True, I don't think I will have an extra bed in my room then, but I will forever look over at the blank wall, though it might have some art on it at that time and not be so blank, and long for my dear friend and roommate. Katie-bug, I'm going to miss you.

Sincerely,
Amanda

I couldn't stop myself from adding 'sincerely' at the end after that last paragraph. But seriously, and I do mean it:

From,
Amanda


Also: we will be blogging together still before we move out, do not worry about that. And from time to time when we are separated. The end, for real.

Love,
Amanda

June, an assessment

We have much to say on this, the last day of June. We will not ignore the many voices calling for our heads, the protests of dismay, or the demand for retribution. We are here to address those who would throw us into a pit of flames and never look back even if they also dropped in their very expensive sun glasses they had just purchased that morning. We will admit it. We have failed. But before you so cruelly dice us into dice size pieces, may we interject that in another way, we have also not failed.

Let us review. . .

Katie, what is the most important goal you achieved?
I got a hair cut. That was the most life altering thing that I did.
And it looks fabulous. It seems that you accomplished about 9 of your 10 goals this month. That is 90%. How does that make you feel?
Maybe I should have some higher goals.
I did not fair so well, I fear. Let me count. . . I cannot say that I can take claim to actually cleaning my side of the room, even though it is clean, considering Juliet and Jeremy did that in preparation for Asian Lawn Party the Second. So, I only succeeded at 66%. You clearly bested me in goal achieving.

Now, as we all know, we had joint goals to try to master. Katie, how did we do in that department?
Well, as our readers will remind us, we did fail on perhaps our most important goal: blogging twice a week. If we could just change that little word 'week' to month, we could have accomplished that.
Why don't we change that? There we go, changed. Now, how did we do . . .
Did we have a an Asian Lawn Party?
Yes.
Did we have it on June 28th?
Yes.
Did we have the opportunity to change it?
Yes.
Did we plan our meals?
Um. . . not as much. . .not at all.
Did we learn where to recycle our cans?
No, we didn't even really do anything about that.
Did we finish our story in our blog?
Nope.
Did we give out more Triumph Points?
Well, no one really stepped up to the plate, to be fair.
Did we love the Royals no matter what?
Yes, in our hearts we did.
And did we blog twice a month?
Twice. . .yes.
How would you rate our success?
Well, sometimes when you set a goal, you find out that is it not that important, so it is okay if you don't achieve it.
So, taking that into consideration, how did we do?
It was pretty failing, to be honest.

Now that we are done with goal making, goal failing, and goal achieving, let's look ahead. What can our readers not expect this next month?
Well, they can expect me to still not go see Iron Man, they can expect me to not get another hair cut in the month of July, they can expect me to not throw my bike over the balcony.
I never asked you to do that.
You didn't say what were we asked to not do.
Oh, I see. I will not ask you to do that this month.

Well, everyone, that is all for tonight. We hope you have had a lovely month of June and that you achieved as much as we did or didn't, depending on which way you look at it.